Sadness...

Today we had it in spades - all because of one little soul.

We have been fighting the battle for the last year when the original diagnosis was made after Trouble was exhibiting a slight limp in her left front. We thought she had badly bruised or perhaps cracked her shoulder. Our vet didn't like the x-ray where there was some shadowing, so they suggested a specialist. After the fiasco we had been through with the orthopedist previously recommended with Arthur, we opted to find another and received a recommendation from a friend.

After new x-rays, he diagnosed the possibility of osteosarcoma in her left scapula - a biopsy confirmed it. He suggested trying a scapulectomy and that she would be able to once again utilize her front leg after the muscles and connective tissue adjusted and strengthened. Unfortunately not long after she had healed from  the surgery, I noticed that the top of the forearm, where it met with the scapula, was slightly enlarged. A lump also appeared where the top of the scapula once was - and it was very painful. Another appointment and another surgery scheduled - the rest of the limb was removed, as was the offending lump.

A couple days post-surgery, the stitches began to split and then it opened up completely. There just wasn't enough good skin to keep it closed - so it was cleaning and wrapping with wet/dry bandages. Trouble took to the routine easily - as soon as we put a towel on the bed, she would jump up and stand on it while we worked on her. She would wag her tail the entire time - and then she would get a treat of some special food.  She healed much quicker than I expected and we thought we could relax for a while. That was in July.

About a month after she healed...the lump reappeared. It was not as aggressive nor was it very painful. We could touch it without her making a sound where previously she would fuss and cry. So we kept an eye on her and she went about her normal business as if nothing had changed and being on three legs didn't hinder her in the slightest. She could always make us smile, but it was touched with sadness, because we knew that the cancer was not going to let her stay as long as we wanted (as if it's ever long enough).

Her remaining front leg began to thicken ever so slightly - hardly noticeable at first. Then the growth appeared on her muzzle - it was spreading. Then her back legs began to thicken as well and we knew it was getting closer and closer. Except for Trouble's outlook - she still was happy go lucky, constantly wagging her  tail - and keeping Victor to the schedule of giving her her special food just before bedtime. She was downright insistent on it. And the lump where her scapula used to be continued to grow.

It became obvious that no matter how much she ate, it was no longer feeding her body - it was feeding the cancer - and she began to lose weight. The last week she dropped down to nothing. We had always used the measure of marking the time of a "decision" to be when a dog quit eating or lost the shine in its eyes where you could see they could try no longer. I looked at her and just knew there was no way that the rimadyl or tramadol was helping her any longer - yet she kept on, her behavior never changing, and still eating regularly.

I went ahead and called the clinic for a Saturday appointment so Victor could be there too. This was a different clinic than we usually use for the dogs, although they come out for the horses. The clinic was  crowded so we left her sleeping in the van for a bit while the clinic cleared out of its appointments. When it was calmer we brought her in and they put us in a room immediately.

What happened will be with me forever as an example of what a pure soul little Trouble (who was anything BUT trouble in her lifetime) truly was. Her front leg was so hardened that we thought being able to administer the shot would not be possible, so they were going to try a vein in her neck. The vet was so gentle with her and talked to her, and they began to give her the injection, but it ended up that the vein collapsed in the process. We watched her but it was obvious that she had not received near enough. She lifted her head and was looking up at the vet, and wagged her tail while he held her head in both hands and stroked her face. The assistant meanwhile had gotten some more of the solution and they quickly found an outside vein in her rear leg. And she was gone. Loving and friendly to the very end. And fearless.

We are heartbroken - she fought so long and never complained. It was almost like she did not want us to worry more.

In her remembrance, here is a link to a poem I found years ago:

http://gryffynsaeyrieborzoi.com/library/living.htm

Rest in peace, free of pain, in our hearts forever.

Rarities BIS Gryffyn's Aeyrie Gypsy Road

3/16/2005 - 2/12/2011

Hard Times - Burni-Man and Ivan-da-Ho

Victor and I figured that 2010 would be a hard year to get through - since we have several elderly dogs residing here, it is inevitable that there would be times of sorrow and tears. Unfortunately we had two boys that we did not foresee losing anytime soon, which make the tears flow even harder. One of the greatest burdens of a dog-lover is that of having to say goodbye.

Ivanhoe was an expert leaner

Ivanhoe had been diagnosed with a spinal injury earlier in the year. He was put on a steroid regimen and limited activity in the hopes that it would remedy the situation and he could regain full use of his left rear leg. After several months, the treatment proved ineffective, although at first it looked as though we may have some success, especially when the hyperaesthesia ceased and he seemed otherwise comfortable.

But then his condition deteriorated and Ivan was euthanized on the morning of July 17. His spinal injury had become too great to bear and he completely lost use of both hind legs. The steroid regimen therapy just could not do enough for him. He would have been 10 years old this month.

I regret that I was not brave enough to accompany him. I made the appointment for when I would not be there and was out of town and Victor took him in and stayed with him. I could not bear to say goodbye to another special boy this year.

BIS RBIS Rarities IABCA Ch. Kristull Ivanhoe
August 10, 2000 - July 17, 2010

We have some lovely descendants here carrying on his beauty, both inside
and out - some of whom assisted him in winning the inaugural Stud Dog
class at Silkenfest in 2009.

Ivan's page on the Gryffyn's Aeyrie web site

Farewell Ivan-da-ho - I wish we could have done more.


Burni showing at the May 2009 Midwest Borzoi Club Specialty

Burni had been diagnosed the other week with possible cancer that had spread to the lungs. He had developed fluid in the chest cavity - although not a pyo- or chylothorax. The specialist thought there were metastatic cells in the fluid as well. A sonogram showed the heart in good condition, although some small dark areas in the lungs. That was when the $$ ran out - and that was with the doctor not charging me to draw and analyze the fluid.

Burni came home and seemed to rally briefly, but then his condition deteriorated. Victor took him in the morning - once again, I was too much of a weenie to go in.

Burni was the last Nikki son we had here. All that is now left is her daughter Duri. I had planned a breeding with Burni that never got consummated - so it's back to square one for Bugg. The only dog down from Burni (or Flareon) that we have here is Lars. I wanted more (and prettier). :(

Burni had some nice highlights in his time in the ring: Best in Sweeps at a BCOA TSE, judge Kanne Bowers - he got his first major that next day at the tender age of 9 months; WD/BOW at the RMBC specialty years ago under Karen Dumke; finished both his Canadian and Mexican championships with group placements; Award of Merit at the BCOA Specialty (July 2003); Best in Vet Sweeps at LSBC's first and second specialty shows; Best Opp in Vet Sweeps at the May 2009 MBC Specialty.

But most of all - he won my heart.

Am. Can. Mex. Ch. Gryffyn's Aeyrie Caliburn, JC
December 22, 2000 - August 28, 2010

Burni's page on the Gryffyn's Aeyrie web site

Requiem for the King

He fought a good fight, but we had to say goodbye.

He was my first champion to finish exclusively from the BBE classes, my first Canadian champion, and my first GRC/SGRC, in addition to being the #1 LGRA Borzoi in 2000. He ran a lap in the Legends portion of the LGRA Nationals a little over a year ago - the photos show him still kicking up a dirt trail at over 10 1/2 years of age. He was also a son of my beloved Nikki, my first Borzoi, who passed a little over a month before her 14th birthday. He still has 3 siblings alive - brothers Merlyn and Lance and sister Gwyn. He has given me some wonderful children who remain here (Sassi, Magik and Deckard) and grandchildren (J/T, Shugah, and our recent Warriors litter).

He was diagnosed with osteosarcoma in March of last year after a leg break. The experiences surrounding that event beginning in January and going until May brought way too much drama and stress and much too long to detail, and culminated in the amputation of his left rear leg. It gave us 10 more months with him and until recently he would zip along in the yard to do his business and would go over and visit his "grandkids" over in their pen. Funny enough he didn't visit the Silken pups - just his daughter Sassi's.

Arthur taking an Award of Merit at the Rocky Mountain Borzoi Club specialty show - Judge: Jon Steele, Auroral Borzoi

He would have been 12 years of age before the end of this month. I am despondent that I will no longer see him grin or get to give him a hug - he was a most special boy.

Am. Can. IABCA Ch. Gryffyn's Once N Future King, JC SGRC
3/21/1998 - 3/9/2010

It's never long enough.

Danu Has Left Us

We had planned on taking her in on Sunday when the clinic opened at 1 for our final goodbyes. She had not done well since a preliminary diagnosis of pancreatic exocrine neoplasia (exocrine tumors - extremely poor prognosis, especially for an 11.5 year old Borzoi). Bloodwork revealed increased pancreatic and kidney values, but a very normal WBC count. The ultrasound to verify was obscenely expensive ($600, including a $139 fee just for the "privilege" of walking through the specialist's front door) for the poorest of odds, so after her Wednesday appointment, we had brought her home to be comfortable until it was time.

I went to check on her and noticed her breathing was labored, and although her eyes were open, she seemed unaware. I went and sat next to her and talked to her and held her paw or kept my hand on her shoulder or behind her head. I guess I was there about 15 minutes, and then she went still.

She was a good girl, although most folks did not know her. She had a couple points towards her championship. While we were at the Reno national, she managed to somehow almost sever part of her tail which we had to amputate upon our return (she was at home while we were away) - so she had a bit less than half a tail. She was funny and happy and never seemed to have a bad day until earlier this week.

I will miss her little happy dance at the back door, and her impish nature, and her habit of planting her front feet down then looking up at the sky, and a jig and another look, and a little wag from her cropped tail.

IABCA Ch. Gryffyns The Last Enchantment
March 28, 1998 - August 30, 2009

Farewell Wee One

Today's dreary weather (more thunderstorms interspersed throughout the day) seemed absolutely sunny compared to the sight that awaited me when I arrived home from work - our approaching-ancient Brussels Griffon, Heather, had passed away during the day. Heather was a rescue - so perhaps she was actually ancient instead of just approaching it. The more I think about it - the more I wonder if she may have personally known Noah. I had been curious about Brussels since seeing them at shows when I first began exhibiting Borzoi. Their little faces reminded me of the 1950s Wolfman I would catch glimpses of when staying up late at night in my high school years sneaking peeks at forbidden horror movies.

Heather was already an adult when she came to live with me. She used to have a torrid love affair with my male Borzoi Nigel - and he certainly thought she was the bee's knees. It was fascinating, in a train wreck kinda way, to watch them flirt and coo over each other. Heather would circle around his front legs, brushing up against him at times like a cat, her nubby tail going back and forth, and her head turned up towards him, sometimes licking at the air as if to say "C'mon big boy!"

The first signs of her aging were her eyes - clouding up and eventually getting a blueish cast. Then she started to lose a bit of her hearing - then pretty much all of it. A few years ago our vet's diagnosed an inoperable mass in her chest cavity - but she seemed comfortable enough. She had also started to accumulate a bit of fluid in her chest, so Lasix was prescribed. She looked like hell - but she was still truckin' along and cleaned up her dish every night. The senility seemed to set in, and she lost more of her sight, occasionally becoming lost in the yard when out to potty - just 10 feet from the door. But her bowl was always licked clean and she would at times, bark her displeasure at whatever unforgivable sound she may have heard.

Yesterday, the food was untouched. We talked about her options and if it was time to go ahead and assist her passing with a visit to the vet, since she no longer seemed to really be "there". I opted to wait another day...just in case she was having an "off day". But no...she was ready...and she took matters into her own little paws.

I guess we were thankful for the recent storms in that the ground was soft. Victor dug a hole in one of the little landscaped areas and she was laid to rest this evening. Now back with her beloved Nigel.